I just finished rereading Till We Have Faces, which I first read in 2015, and which I wrote about here.
Six years later, my insights into the book are very different.
Orual and Psyche could still be seen as two different people. They are both on a faith journey, but Psyche makes the leap of faith first, years before Orual does. We could see this as our relationship with people around us. We may be on the same path, but on different points on that path. It gets very difficult when we find we are not on the same page as our loved one, but that’s how it is.
OR, as I am now seeing, Orual and Psyche are two facets of the same person. Something about that line, “You also are Psyche” stuck with me. Why would the god say that? How is Orual also Psyche?
Again, Psyche is the part of us that takes things at face value. We immediately see the beauty in front of us, and we get frustrated when others don’t see it the way we do. Their blindness doesn’t diminish the love, but we can’t go back to unseeing. Our world is forever changed, we can only weep and wait for them to catch up.
On the other hand, Orual is that part of us that is always questioning, always doubting, refusing to believe even when we’ve already seen glimpses of the Divine.
Ungit is all of our false gods. In today’s world it’s everything we’ve formed inordinate attachments to: material possessions, power, attention, sex. Even when we have an Arnom beside us that mocks the absurdity and falsity of everything, we’re still stuck going through the motions, the rituals, because they’re comfortable, they’re “how things have always been done”.
Even after Orual had seen Psyche’s palace, she STILL chooses to disbelieve. She chooses to go back home, to hide herself, to veil, to fill her time and her life with all the attachments. She tries to find happiness and fulfilment in her work, in Bardia. She grows old, refusing to forgive Psyche, refusing to forgive herself. It is not until she is able to give up all her attachments that she is finally able to see, as Psyche sees. And she finally sees, that she too, is beautiful, as I wrote in my old blog post. Truth, goodness, and beauty — all of these are finally hers.
Might Orual have spared herself the pain, the anguish, the suffering, if she had taken that leap of faith years before? Perhaps. But this journey was hers to take, so it cannot look like anyone else’s. She had to go through all of that to get here.
No more time, but I will add more to this/edit when I get the chance.
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